I think I may have given birth!!!?

Question: I was constipated for about 2 hours, then finally I pushed extremely hard and I heard a pop. I looked into the potty and there was a brownish/white baby shaped object. I am not familiar with it, so I put it in a bag and I am going to take it to the nearest hospital. I do not think it was breathing.

Answer:Man, I hope you check it really good to see if it was breathing before you put it in a plastic bag.

What jobs don't drug test?

Answer: drug dealer?
now but seriously at mcdonalds you can smoke weed

Original question here.

Can you rap about me?

Question: Can you rap about me?

I'm 25, 6'3, overweight, I live with my parents, and am broke. My life is a struggle. Can you write a rap about me? Best one wins.

Answer:
Yo Yo Yo Yo Yo Yo Yo
So my life is struggle, I don't like to juggle
I’m a fatty fat pants, I even eat ants
I’m twenty five, but at this weight who knows why I’m alive
Some wonder why I’m tall, am I even human at all
I never get any calls; I don’t even reach the mall
I always order in, and wonder why everyone’s so thin
I wish I could go out more, but I can’t fit through my door

Parents don’t want me anymore, cleaning up my crumbs is a chore
They want me to live on my own, cause they think I’m too grown
I post stupid questions on yahoo answers, while I’m at the computer eating apetizers

Chorus: (sing to the beat of we fly high by Jim Jones)
I stay broke, no joke, and you notice
IM STRUGGLING
twenty five, no lies
I'm alone and
So sad, no plaid
IM REAL TALL

Original question here.

How to say"U r veryvery HANDSOME man or boy today and very intelligent good nice sexy goodlooking boy man now"?

Question: How to say"U r veryvery HANDSOME man or boy today and very intelligent good nice sexy goodlooking boy man now"?

in any language language language

that u know ??



to teach ALL the waitresses waitresses

in my restaurants restaurants restaurants

in my restaurants restaurants restaurants

business business business

Original question here.

Why does every cat on earth respond to "kitty kitty"?

Answer: becaus its a cute name. i like llamas do u? its because they ARE kitties arnt they? DO U LIKE LLAMAS???? ANSWER ME FOOL

Has Slam Poetry become cliche?

I wanna start by saying I couldn't write a poem if my life depended on it.
& I am Not a pro with it at all.

I remember it seemingly came out of nowhere about 10, 15 years ago & at the time, I remember thinking it was so original.

Now I'm hearing it on tv show promos.

What do people more familiar with poetry think?

Is this a weird thought?

My friend said that he wishes time would freeze so he could have sex with random hot strangers and have them never know it. The only thing that would prevent him from doing this would be STDs..and even getting the women pregnant he wouldn't care about so much, but contributing to the overpopulation of the world, he would care about.

If I am in an audience and feel as though the speaker makes eye contact with me more than others ?

is it in my mind? Seriously, The speaker looks around but sometimes the eye contact is even longer. Could it be because I look very attentive to the speaker and what they're saying? Do they sometimes pick someone out of the crowd to look at more than others or is this a mind thing on my part?

See original question here.